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When I Say No, I Feel Guilty Manuel J. Smith
Publisher: Bantam

For some, the result of doing something “wrong” is guilt. We've been brought up with great family values. Throughout history, women have been those who pleased others. I never questioned my mothering until he came into my life. The inner battle was to either avoid saying no, or to say no, but then they feel guilty and take it back later. You might be familiar with the feeling. I feel guilty when I have to say no and I feel guilty when I say yes and spoil him. Admit it we are people pleasers. And because I love them, I don't feel guilty saying “no” when I think it is the appropriate answer. When I tried to stand up for myself, and say a firm “no”, they would guilt trip me. Or I feel that with a home filled to the rafters with love and “stuff”, they don't always need to pine after things they don't have. Some of us feel guilty whenever we want to say no. We want to help the poor and save the world! When I Say “No,” I Feel Guilty. Then you feel guilty for being somehow “lesser than” all those women/mothers who seem to be doing it right.